How, if at all?

I am struggling so much today.
I have had to learn so many things in my life so far.
In my twenties, I was selfish and knew it all.
In my thirties I had my head handed to me more than once.
In my forties I have tried to learn grace,
to keep my mouth shut,
follow the path God has for me.

But how do all these life lessons help loved ones
who need to hear but don't want to?
Am I supposed to be supportive and silent and allow them to learn
their own life's lessons in their own brokenness?
Do I offer insights and lessons,
even though most of the time they fall of deaf ears?
Do I plan times for others, even when all I really want to do
is spin and nap and be selfish myself?
I feel as though I have failed in two instances today.
One I gladly joined, but kept tight chains over my tongue.
The other was unexpected and I am afraid
that while I was trying to find the meekness in words,
my tongue escaped and I did more harm than good.
Do I float through this life with loved ones,
and only offer smiles?
All their situations are different, as are mine.
No one can live in my head.
My own short comings hold me back so often,
that I do not hear the Spirit when I need to hear the most.
I hope I have learned to be content with what I am given every day.
I try not to make too many plans, as they will inevitably be changed.
My heart and gut are aching today because I can't fix anything for anyone else.
It is a struggle to give it over to God and let Him work on
others hearts and minds and bodies.
I must let my mind focus on what I can do and not what I cannot do.
So much of life is really so very simple.
We just need to get out of our own way.
We need to seek love and inspiration from those who are ment to give to us,
and not those who are not in the path.
We can only do what we can do at the moment.
Only decide for ourselves the next step or action.
If I fall, someone can help me up, but only I am going to feel the pain of the injury.
I cannot expect anyone to feel my pain instead of me.
That would be cruel.
So why do we expect others to carry our burdens and make our decisions for us?
And would we truly follow their plan?
There is a saying: 
We see others and wish for their lives,
but as soon as we get the problems we did not see,
we would gladly give back and take our own with joy.

So, after so much rambling, I will try to do what I can.
I will offer thoughts if asked, but only part, and only if asked.
I will pray for clear moments and introspection for my self and loved ones,
because it is only from within,
with God's help,
that we can truly see what is choking our lives.
More often than not, it is of our own making,
and only we can change that.
No one else should have to.

But.....
I digress, again.
Let go and let God!